If you care, which I assume you do, seeing as I still keep writing, my exams are going on. Big whoo!
Best times of my life. I really cant think of a better time than when Im buried under books and papers studing things I completely dont give a shit about.
If you did believe those two sentences, close the window and go sleep mate, seriously. Or go read my earlier, more sober posts that express my profound "love" for exams.
I have a fear that my mind slowly ceases to think the way I usually do and that I succumb to the persuasive Textbook. A vacant blackhole is not what I wish my mind to me.
Chemical equations and formulae and cout statements are not what I want to remember. But when was the last time the textbook cared what the student wanted or didn't want.
I have nothing to express. Nothing to convey. Nothing to complain. Only to Remain.
Exit ->
V
________________
Now Studying : Chemical Kinetics
Now Listening : Turn Around - Flo Rida
Sunday, 19 December 2010
Saturday, 27 November 2010
Novembers With Me
Hey there.
Spoiler Alert: This post contains major soberness. If you have something against shit like that, close the window and carry on.
I've never enjoyed November. Not in Muscat. Except maybe that the weather's not a bitch and things seem to go slower when the temperatures are lower. People seem more content with what they have and somehow appreciate the lack of Sun. A quality we tend to forget while sweating.
And somehow even at the slow pace, things come to an end and exams approach. I hate exams. If you're a reader you probably already knew this. Now comes the time where I subdue and drown myself in notes printed by the knowledge of another. And then begins the search for non-existent notebooks. For worksheets that somehow never get completed.
All this thinking leaves me a little tired, sleepy and just sad. Sad that the only way I currently prove myself in the world is by these exams.
But put all that aside, and let me ask you a question;
Have you ever seen God in a person?
I cannot explain this in words. Not in writing, atleast. But I will try.
Its looking beyond a person's eyes. Into their actions, into their words. And them making a change in you. With or without their knowlwdge, better without.
I know it sounded cheesy and almost like a slogan fr some fantasy book. But thats the best I can. Do with it what u may.
I probably believe in this more than the conventional methods of praying. But thats just me. The less I talk about it, the less I am misunderstood.
But where there is a question, there must be an answer.
Find the answer. See if you find God in anybody.
Theres a lot more hope in life then.
And thats what life is.
Hope for a better tomorrow.
Hope that tomorrow aint the day when u look forward to another tomorrow.
Ladies and Gentlemen, find the answer and find the Hope. Im just happy to help.
Spreading the Love,
V
______________________________________________________
Now Reading - Computer Science (Class XII) - Sumita Arora
Now Listening - Phir Dekhiye - Rock On!!
Now Feeling - A bit sober
Spoiler Alert: This post contains major soberness. If you have something against shit like that, close the window and carry on.
I've never enjoyed November. Not in Muscat. Except maybe that the weather's not a bitch and things seem to go slower when the temperatures are lower. People seem more content with what they have and somehow appreciate the lack of Sun. A quality we tend to forget while sweating.
And somehow even at the slow pace, things come to an end and exams approach. I hate exams. If you're a reader you probably already knew this. Now comes the time where I subdue and drown myself in notes printed by the knowledge of another. And then begins the search for non-existent notebooks. For worksheets that somehow never get completed.
All this thinking leaves me a little tired, sleepy and just sad. Sad that the only way I currently prove myself in the world is by these exams.
But put all that aside, and let me ask you a question;
Have you ever seen God in a person?
I cannot explain this in words. Not in writing, atleast. But I will try.
Its looking beyond a person's eyes. Into their actions, into their words. And them making a change in you. With or without their knowlwdge, better without.
I know it sounded cheesy and almost like a slogan fr some fantasy book. But thats the best I can. Do with it what u may.
I probably believe in this more than the conventional methods of praying. But thats just me. The less I talk about it, the less I am misunderstood.
But where there is a question, there must be an answer.
Find the answer. See if you find God in anybody.
Theres a lot more hope in life then.
And thats what life is.
Hope for a better tomorrow.
Hope that tomorrow aint the day when u look forward to another tomorrow.
Ladies and Gentlemen, find the answer and find the Hope. Im just happy to help.
Spreading the Love,
V
______________________________________________________
Now Reading - Computer Science (Class XII) - Sumita Arora
Now Listening - Phir Dekhiye - Rock On!!
Now Feeling - A bit sober
Monday, 22 November 2010
Thou Art My Beautiful Prize
Im in the middle of an academic transition so I dont have to give u any more excuses as to why you havent seen too many posts from this side of the screen.
Its my last year in school and apart from trying to figure out where I stand in life, I also have to "study" (whatever that means :P) so I'm finding writing a bit hard at the moment. I wrote the SAT subject tests last month and its probably a gold bar for most NRIs trying to enter college in India through the DASA scheme. But most of us take it during 12th so how exactly is it an effective way of testing a students capacity? I have a lot more on this but Im really lazy at the moment so sue me.
I have no thoughts as of now and I have absolutely nothing to capture your attention with.
But to think of it, only your own imagination can capture your own attention.
Im at the point in life where theres no time to contemplate, procrastinate and no time to act too cool about a stand you take just because you can. This is the time where I shut the fuck up and do what I have to do. No questions asked. As much as you want to complain about the system, the only way you're ever gonna get out is by infiltration. Satisfy the system and then run for your fucking life.
So until I catch that train, the system's all I got. Fail.
I dont particularly enjoy poems. But I write some when lines strike me.
Like this one I wrote in Physics tuition yesterday.
If any "person" is affected/happy by this poem then I apologize, because it doesn't relate to a living being.
Thou Art My Beautiful Prize
Thou art my beautiful prize
Your open close and open eyes
Thou art my enterprise
where all will sell and all will buy
Thou art the one who never cries
For curse that comes, away it flies
Thou art one who must never revise
For truth is always where truth will reside
Thy modest strength at eating bytes
As filled hard-drives do make me smile
Now with your eyes visible is more
Along with you is no closed door
Wherever it may lie, from the floor
With you I'll find it, be that for sure
With your help I'll plant all seeds
Discover more and ever more feeds
Along with you I'll find all that is free
Copyright violations, Oh Please!
LimeWire, uTorrent, PirateBay
fill ever more on my shopping tray
Shut a site or block it out
But where a door closes, will a window shout
So why go into a bother
When my beautiful Prize Spreads The Love Brother?
And now before I bid you adieu
I leave you one final two
Thou art my beautiful prize
Your open close and open eyes...
That poem was not meant to be anything. So dont hate.
Today, my 16 year old son told me, “I’m not afraid of death. I’m afraid of life and what it means if I die before I achieve my dreams.” MMT
Goodnite folks
-
V
_________________________________
Now reading : Chemistry Journal
Now Listening : Up Saw Liz - Stromae
Now Feeling : Nothing
Its my last year in school and apart from trying to figure out where I stand in life, I also have to "study" (whatever that means :P) so I'm finding writing a bit hard at the moment. I wrote the SAT subject tests last month and its probably a gold bar for most NRIs trying to enter college in India through the DASA scheme. But most of us take it during 12th so how exactly is it an effective way of testing a students capacity? I have a lot more on this but Im really lazy at the moment so sue me.
I have no thoughts as of now and I have absolutely nothing to capture your attention with.
But to think of it, only your own imagination can capture your own attention.
Im at the point in life where theres no time to contemplate, procrastinate and no time to act too cool about a stand you take just because you can. This is the time where I shut the fuck up and do what I have to do. No questions asked. As much as you want to complain about the system, the only way you're ever gonna get out is by infiltration. Satisfy the system and then run for your fucking life.
So until I catch that train, the system's all I got. Fail.
I dont particularly enjoy poems. But I write some when lines strike me.
Like this one I wrote in Physics tuition yesterday.
If any "person" is affected/happy by this poem then I apologize, because it doesn't relate to a living being.
Thou Art My Beautiful Prize
Thou art my beautiful prize
Your open close and open eyes
Thou art my enterprise
where all will sell and all will buy
Thou art the one who never cries
For curse that comes, away it flies
Thou art one who must never revise
For truth is always where truth will reside
Thy modest strength at eating bytes
As filled hard-drives do make me smile
Now with your eyes visible is more
Along with you is no closed door
Wherever it may lie, from the floor
With you I'll find it, be that for sure
With your help I'll plant all seeds
Discover more and ever more feeds
Along with you I'll find all that is free
Copyright violations, Oh Please!
LimeWire, uTorrent, PirateBay
fill ever more on my shopping tray
Shut a site or block it out
But where a door closes, will a window shout
So why go into a bother
When my beautiful Prize Spreads The Love Brother?
And now before I bid you adieu
I leave you one final two
Thou art my beautiful prize
Your open close and open eyes...
That poem was not meant to be anything. So dont hate.
Today, my 16 year old son told me, “I’m not afraid of death. I’m afraid of life and what it means if I die before I achieve my dreams.” MMT
Goodnite folks
-
V
_________________________________
Now reading : Chemistry Journal
Now Listening : Up Saw Liz - Stromae
Now Feeling : Nothing
Monday, 25 October 2010
To Forgotten Days
Why are there pleasantries before talking?
If I really did want to know how you were, I'd ask you, once I'd asked you what I already wanted to ask.
Asking a person how they are and just greeting them with 1 of the 10 ways we will ever know in our lives to say, "Hi" is just odd.
Once in a while comes along a person with an actual reply to the question. Like I'm good. Or I just am. Or I stand and do, but I'm open to change (In response to how do you do?)
But we cant really do anything about it can we? Because we fail to realize that the slight awkwardness/embarrassment that we might experience in the greeting is far less than the damage we infer by actually talking to them.
Dont judge me. I dont mind saying Hello? How Are You? everytime I see someone. Maybe its just my programming to expect a genuine answer. Sue me.
This piece and my current state of mind were inspired by (500) Days Of Summer. A brilliant piece of film. Because of the story. Because of how the camera is placed. And because all that I will remember of this movie will make me smile. Like that final girl's name.
Its 4.45 in the afternoon and I dont think I've ever written anything at this time before.
School wasn't my thing for today. Stayed at home and got some studying done. (Yes, you did read that right)
First thing I wake up to is no clock telling me its not the time I would like to wake up at. The clock just said Hey, you're up. Breakfast that I could eat without having to wear my shirt at the same time. A shower without my mum knocking on the door.
Now if you pictured all that, thats pretty neat innit.
But all this is just going against what I want to say.
We remember things as just the good points/parts. Like one scene in a movie. One Season in a TV series. One episode in a Season. One bite from a meal. One conversation from a million. One shirt from a wardrobe. One Woman from the rest.
Life's like that I guess and I got no issues. But is it really worth enduring all the things you're gonna forget only to forget them?
I got no answer for that. A lot, actually but none that make sense.
Maybe it will all come back to us. One day when we are doing something completely unrelated, shit like that will just strike us and slap us in the face. Tell you that dinner that day was great only because of who you had it with. You forgot that the food sucked.
Or that the movie was good only because one scene actually represented your mindset. Forgot that the rest of the movie and everything about it was a piece of shit.
Think Again.
There are days in your life which you actually forgot. Because they had nothing that stood out except the fact that they ended and there is hope you will remember the next day.
Hope that the day that you will forget will be forgotten completely and will never trouble you again like the others do sometimes.
And thats all life is. Hope.
Hope that the specific parts of things you remember are enough to fill the gaps all this forgetting leaves.
Hope that one day you will look back and not see the gaps left empty. But look for more room to remember more.
I hope for a life like that.
And for all I know I might get it. And more.
What really boils the noodle is knowing;
Knowing when really is the right time to look back?
Until then, raise them Glasses,
To Forgotten Days,
V
_____________________________________________________________
"May I never miss a sunset or a rainbow because I am looking
down."
Now Reading : Barron's Prep Book for SAT Subject test : Physics
Now Listening: To my hard drive spin with data.
Now Feeling: Happy.
If I really did want to know how you were, I'd ask you, once I'd asked you what I already wanted to ask.
Asking a person how they are and just greeting them with 1 of the 10 ways we will ever know in our lives to say, "Hi" is just odd.
Once in a while comes along a person with an actual reply to the question. Like I'm good. Or I just am. Or I stand and do, but I'm open to change (In response to how do you do?)
But we cant really do anything about it can we? Because we fail to realize that the slight awkwardness/embarrassment that we might experience in the greeting is far less than the damage we infer by actually talking to them.
Dont judge me. I dont mind saying Hello? How Are You? everytime I see someone. Maybe its just my programming to expect a genuine answer. Sue me.
This piece and my current state of mind were inspired by (500) Days Of Summer. A brilliant piece of film. Because of the story. Because of how the camera is placed. And because all that I will remember of this movie will make me smile. Like that final girl's name.
Its 4.45 in the afternoon and I dont think I've ever written anything at this time before.
School wasn't my thing for today. Stayed at home and got some studying done. (Yes, you did read that right)
First thing I wake up to is no clock telling me its not the time I would like to wake up at. The clock just said Hey, you're up. Breakfast that I could eat without having to wear my shirt at the same time. A shower without my mum knocking on the door.
Now if you pictured all that, thats pretty neat innit.
But all this is just going against what I want to say.
We remember things as just the good points/parts. Like one scene in a movie. One Season in a TV series. One episode in a Season. One bite from a meal. One conversation from a million. One shirt from a wardrobe. One Woman from the rest.
Life's like that I guess and I got no issues. But is it really worth enduring all the things you're gonna forget only to forget them?
I got no answer for that. A lot, actually but none that make sense.
Maybe it will all come back to us. One day when we are doing something completely unrelated, shit like that will just strike us and slap us in the face. Tell you that dinner that day was great only because of who you had it with. You forgot that the food sucked.
Or that the movie was good only because one scene actually represented your mindset. Forgot that the rest of the movie and everything about it was a piece of shit.
Think Again.
There are days in your life which you actually forgot. Because they had nothing that stood out except the fact that they ended and there is hope you will remember the next day.
Hope that the day that you will forget will be forgotten completely and will never trouble you again like the others do sometimes.
And thats all life is. Hope.
Hope that the specific parts of things you remember are enough to fill the gaps all this forgetting leaves.
Hope that one day you will look back and not see the gaps left empty. But look for more room to remember more.
I hope for a life like that.
And for all I know I might get it. And more.
What really boils the noodle is knowing;
Knowing when really is the right time to look back?
Until then, raise them Glasses,
To Forgotten Days,
V
_____________________________________________________________
"May I never miss a sunset or a rainbow because I am looking
down."
Now Reading : Barron's Prep Book for SAT Subject test : Physics
Now Listening: To my hard drive spin with data.
Now Feeling: Happy.
Thursday, 30 September 2010
The Welcome Mat
I apologize if you look forward to seeing the words my hands type appear on your screen. I have been postponing doing this. There have been many weekends passing with something else more important than you. Or so it felt like at that time.
If youre not a reader and just found this by your own course of life, then take the time to reach the last fullstop and not stop at this one .
I am a thought filled person and I take my time with my decisions. But the past few months have been more or less impulsive. Doing things without sparing them much thougt. Its not like a life altering process but I feel like I dont know the person who did all the things I just did.
But a lot has happened since then and that person has disappeared only for me to resurface.
I am a bored, sleepy and lazy person and I need some boosts once in a while to realize all the beauty in life.
Jhankaar did just that. I didnt participate in anything. Neither did I do too much work. But I was there. A part of my school. For the last time. I represented that which I love. And I felt happy when I got back home. Happy that places like the field stands and the multipurpose hall and the basketball courts will bring back memories. Memories of periods bunked, of events attended. Of things I've done in these years at school. A little early to get all emotional about my school you might say but its never too early to start liking something more.
Every corridor and every teacher and every part of my school has a memory linked to it. And that memory never was and never will be the same if it weren't for me. And thats as close to the best feeling on Earth.
And here I am, realizing that in a few months Im about to lose all thats bin important for me all my life. Im not going to be a school student in a few months.
But Im smiling. Why? Because I am not losing anything.
All there was shall remain. And all there is to be shall be.
Sentiments apart and onto what this post is about.
Im going to watch Shawshank Redemption again for the nth time and I already know I'll be a happier person once I've seen it.
Because the movie doesnt talk about redemption by actually killing a woman and going to jail. In fact many people feel that Andy finds redemption by becoming the rich man in the convertible car and the beach scenery. But thats just a picture to hang on your wall. Or a welcome mat.
Redemption is with Red. Redemption is in decency a man shows even in prison. Redemption is in how a man retains integrity till his death. Redemption is in leaving prison a more peace-filled man. Redemption is in saying True Salvation Comes From Within.
Redemption is in living a life with simple emotions.
You could do the flashiest of things, eat the unhealthiest of foods and drive the fastest of cars and still live a simple life if all you are made up of are simple emotions.
Life is far too complicated as it is for us to make it worse.
Make simple choices. And express simple emotions and life is good.
Complex emotions stop a man from walking up to a woman and telling her that she looks good. Complex emotions stop someone from going upto someone and just asking them what the problem is.
But without exception, you will disagree. And if you actually tell me that, whether we know each other or not. Whether we like each other or not. Whether we care or not. Then you just proved me right.
Redemption is in Simple Emotions.
Cheers to Good Movies,
V
______________________________
Now Listening - Nothing.
Now Watching - The Shawshank Redemption
Now Reading - Eldest - Christopher Paolini ( I Cannot wait for the fourth book)
Now Feeling - Oddly Happy
If youre not a reader and just found this by your own course of life, then take the time to reach the last fullstop and not stop at this one .
I am a thought filled person and I take my time with my decisions. But the past few months have been more or less impulsive. Doing things without sparing them much thougt. Its not like a life altering process but I feel like I dont know the person who did all the things I just did.
But a lot has happened since then and that person has disappeared only for me to resurface.
I am a bored, sleepy and lazy person and I need some boosts once in a while to realize all the beauty in life.
Jhankaar did just that. I didnt participate in anything. Neither did I do too much work. But I was there. A part of my school. For the last time. I represented that which I love. And I felt happy when I got back home. Happy that places like the field stands and the multipurpose hall and the basketball courts will bring back memories. Memories of periods bunked, of events attended. Of things I've done in these years at school. A little early to get all emotional about my school you might say but its never too early to start liking something more.
Every corridor and every teacher and every part of my school has a memory linked to it. And that memory never was and never will be the same if it weren't for me. And thats as close to the best feeling on Earth.
And here I am, realizing that in a few months Im about to lose all thats bin important for me all my life. Im not going to be a school student in a few months.
But Im smiling. Why? Because I am not losing anything.
All there was shall remain. And all there is to be shall be.
Sentiments apart and onto what this post is about.
Im going to watch Shawshank Redemption again for the nth time and I already know I'll be a happier person once I've seen it.
Because the movie doesnt talk about redemption by actually killing a woman and going to jail. In fact many people feel that Andy finds redemption by becoming the rich man in the convertible car and the beach scenery. But thats just a picture to hang on your wall. Or a welcome mat.
Redemption is with Red. Redemption is in decency a man shows even in prison. Redemption is in how a man retains integrity till his death. Redemption is in leaving prison a more peace-filled man. Redemption is in saying True Salvation Comes From Within.
Redemption is in living a life with simple emotions.
You could do the flashiest of things, eat the unhealthiest of foods and drive the fastest of cars and still live a simple life if all you are made up of are simple emotions.
Life is far too complicated as it is for us to make it worse.
Make simple choices. And express simple emotions and life is good.
Complex emotions stop a man from walking up to a woman and telling her that she looks good. Complex emotions stop someone from going upto someone and just asking them what the problem is.
But without exception, you will disagree. And if you actually tell me that, whether we know each other or not. Whether we like each other or not. Whether we care or not. Then you just proved me right.
Redemption is in Simple Emotions.
Cheers to Good Movies,
V
______________________________
Now Listening - Nothing.
Now Watching - The Shawshank Redemption
Now Reading - Eldest - Christopher Paolini ( I Cannot wait for the fourth book)
Now Feeling - Oddly Happy
Thursday, 26 August 2010
Fire In The Hole
Its that time of my life again when I have an exam coming up and have a compulsive urge to write.
Exams bring out another side of me. An irritable, sleep-deprived, hungry, bored and slightly, sorry, extremely confused side.
I dont remember the last time I was excited because of an exam. Many of you might actually say who does? But there are people like that. And in all probability, you fit into the slickest of groups and just blend and wait there. Wait for an exam to let your true side awaken.
Dont protest, we all know who you are. Question is, do you?
Past the pleasantries.
I often ask myself if I dislike exams because I dont do well in them. And I've done well a few times and the answer was no. I still didnt like the exam.
I then asked myself if I hated what they asked in the exam. Then I realized I hate examinations as an institution. As a concept. I hated how it has become a part of my wonderful life. Always around when I dont need it.
I had a physics exam today and it went better than I hoped it would. Needless to say I still dint enjoy writing it. A guy, like 4 desks in front of me puked halfway through. God knows what he ate last nite.
And twice after that the fire alarm rang, screwing my already pounding head. It happens all the time where I study, some dude (or dudette, with all due respect) pulls the alarm giving us an easy 5 minute breather.
This time, everyone, including me, had the idea that it was all just a joke and you wouldn't really care.
Or so I thought.
I could handpick maybe 15-20 people who actually looked back both times.
For the sake of an argument from a person who didnt write much today, put aside the fact that we instinctively knew it wasnt serious.
The first thing that struck me was that if we continued to be the ignorant, assuming fools we usually are, I would die writing an exam. I leave the repercussions of that thought to your own insanity and ingenuity.
Most people just continued writing. Wrote and wrote while the alarm slowly stopped to exist in many of our minds. It represented that which did not exist. A false hope. An emergency exit that always remained locked. A car that always remained parked.
As I saw the back of all the inclined heads, trying to find redemption or atleast the charge of a particle, it struck me. The silent, unassuming brilliance of it.
Somehow, this institution of exams is so deeply imbibed in you that your subconscious rules out the possibility of danger due to fire, placing higher fear and importance to the paper and pen that lie in front of you. It sounds practical actually, to place importance at what lies in front of you rather than at what lies beyond you.
If you are trapped by this perspective, do something about it. Im not asking you to start hating exams.
Im asking you to put out the fire. In whatever way that affects you.
In one way or another, a fire took place today. Not a fire that helps us live but one that tries to stop us from doing so.
I put it out today. Not out there, but in here, in my mind.
But at the end, this is just an argument.
Its your call whether you argue for or against me.
Unscathed, for now atleast,
V
____________________________________________________
In other news, Im reading The Zahir- Paulo Coelho which contemplates what a Free Man is. Ironic that I must read and agree with him, when I am at a stage of least freedom.
Also, I'm on a rediscovery of Coldplay. Comforting when you're up all night with a headache.
Now Listening: Coldplay
Now Reading: The Zahir - Paulo Coelho
Now Feeling: Warm
Exams bring out another side of me. An irritable, sleep-deprived, hungry, bored and slightly, sorry, extremely confused side.
I dont remember the last time I was excited because of an exam. Many of you might actually say who does? But there are people like that. And in all probability, you fit into the slickest of groups and just blend and wait there. Wait for an exam to let your true side awaken.
Dont protest, we all know who you are. Question is, do you?
Past the pleasantries.
I often ask myself if I dislike exams because I dont do well in them. And I've done well a few times and the answer was no. I still didnt like the exam.
I then asked myself if I hated what they asked in the exam. Then I realized I hate examinations as an institution. As a concept. I hated how it has become a part of my wonderful life. Always around when I dont need it.
I had a physics exam today and it went better than I hoped it would. Needless to say I still dint enjoy writing it. A guy, like 4 desks in front of me puked halfway through. God knows what he ate last nite.
And twice after that the fire alarm rang, screwing my already pounding head. It happens all the time where I study, some dude (or dudette, with all due respect) pulls the alarm giving us an easy 5 minute breather.
This time, everyone, including me, had the idea that it was all just a joke and you wouldn't really care.
Or so I thought.
I could handpick maybe 15-20 people who actually looked back both times.
For the sake of an argument from a person who didnt write much today, put aside the fact that we instinctively knew it wasnt serious.
The first thing that struck me was that if we continued to be the ignorant, assuming fools we usually are, I would die writing an exam. I leave the repercussions of that thought to your own insanity and ingenuity.
Most people just continued writing. Wrote and wrote while the alarm slowly stopped to exist in many of our minds. It represented that which did not exist. A false hope. An emergency exit that always remained locked. A car that always remained parked.
As I saw the back of all the inclined heads, trying to find redemption or atleast the charge of a particle, it struck me. The silent, unassuming brilliance of it.
Somehow, this institution of exams is so deeply imbibed in you that your subconscious rules out the possibility of danger due to fire, placing higher fear and importance to the paper and pen that lie in front of you. It sounds practical actually, to place importance at what lies in front of you rather than at what lies beyond you.
If you are trapped by this perspective, do something about it. Im not asking you to start hating exams.
Im asking you to put out the fire. In whatever way that affects you.
In one way or another, a fire took place today. Not a fire that helps us live but one that tries to stop us from doing so.
I put it out today. Not out there, but in here, in my mind.
But at the end, this is just an argument.
Its your call whether you argue for or against me.
Unscathed, for now atleast,
V
____________________________________________________
In other news, Im reading The Zahir- Paulo Coelho which contemplates what a Free Man is. Ironic that I must read and agree with him, when I am at a stage of least freedom.
Also, I'm on a rediscovery of Coldplay. Comforting when you're up all night with a headache.
Now Listening: Coldplay
Now Reading: The Zahir - Paulo Coelho
Now Feeling: Warm
Friday, 6 August 2010
Freedom Is Just A Word
Hey you.
How are you?
Those 3 words I just typed, I ask them everyday, a million times to everyone I meet in all the languages I know those words in. But I dont know how many of them I actually care about. How many people's replies to those 3 words will actually affect my state of mind. But I still continue asking this question everyday and will continue to do so till I exit. Why? Because I might just start caring.
Now, onto what this post is all about.
What is freedom?
Most people spend an entire life never answering that question. And if you think a 16 year old can answer that in a blog, you should probably go read something else.
I know people in my family, and even teachers from my school who have tried to capture that would get them freedom and failed miserably. One who found that freedom was less freer than what he just escaped and another who found freedom in what he once despised.
Point is freedom is not something we all want. Freedom is an opposite of what one currently has. Freedom is a perspective different from reality. Different as in an altogether 180 of reality. The other side is greener. And most of the times when you cross the road, you get run over by a truck. Most of the time we're like bugs, fascinated by the lamp but unaware that touching it is gonna burn us. Fascinated by the outside but fail to see the glass that stops us from going through.
Freedom is a concept that we have to understand, we may never truly understand.
Freedom is in Manual labour. In driving a convertible car with the wind rushing past your face. Its coming home to a beatiful son/daughter. Its living life on your own terms. Its yourself. Its Literature. Its Music. Its Chocolate.
And while this is freedom to you it may be what I'm trying to free myself from. That is perspective.
All said and done, we all fight for freedom, live for freedom. But how do we know we actually have it? I dont know.
But, as ever, there is a possibility (isn't there always?) that what I've written is all wrong and there is no freedom. For all we know, that may be the truth.
Maybe accepting this truth is freedom.
Think Again. Maybe Freedom is just a word. Another word for life.
So find life. Find life in your life. And you've found freedom.
A Free Man,
V
_________________________
Now Listening : Coil-Opeth
Day That Never Comes - Metallica
Now Watching : Traffic. Muscat Traffic.
Just Read : The Blue Nowhere - Jeffery Deaver (Awesome Book)
Now Dreading : The Approach of the Exam
How are you?
Those 3 words I just typed, I ask them everyday, a million times to everyone I meet in all the languages I know those words in. But I dont know how many of them I actually care about. How many people's replies to those 3 words will actually affect my state of mind. But I still continue asking this question everyday and will continue to do so till I exit. Why? Because I might just start caring.
Now, onto what this post is all about.
What is freedom?
Most people spend an entire life never answering that question. And if you think a 16 year old can answer that in a blog, you should probably go read something else.
I know people in my family, and even teachers from my school who have tried to capture that would get them freedom and failed miserably. One who found that freedom was less freer than what he just escaped and another who found freedom in what he once despised.
Point is freedom is not something we all want. Freedom is an opposite of what one currently has. Freedom is a perspective different from reality. Different as in an altogether 180 of reality. The other side is greener. And most of the times when you cross the road, you get run over by a truck. Most of the time we're like bugs, fascinated by the lamp but unaware that touching it is gonna burn us. Fascinated by the outside but fail to see the glass that stops us from going through.
Freedom is a concept that we have to understand, we may never truly understand.
Freedom is in Manual labour. In driving a convertible car with the wind rushing past your face. Its coming home to a beatiful son/daughter. Its living life on your own terms. Its yourself. Its Literature. Its Music. Its Chocolate.
And while this is freedom to you it may be what I'm trying to free myself from. That is perspective.
All said and done, we all fight for freedom, live for freedom. But how do we know we actually have it? I dont know.
But, as ever, there is a possibility (isn't there always?) that what I've written is all wrong and there is no freedom. For all we know, that may be the truth.
Maybe accepting this truth is freedom.
Think Again. Maybe Freedom is just a word. Another word for life.
So find life. Find life in your life. And you've found freedom.
A Free Man,
V
_________________________
Now Listening : Coil-Opeth
Day That Never Comes - Metallica
Now Watching : Traffic. Muscat Traffic.
Just Read : The Blue Nowhere - Jeffery Deaver (Awesome Book)
Now Dreading : The Approach of the Exam
Monday, 12 July 2010
Its Because You Disagree
Hello,
The FIFA World Cup Final is running in front of me but I'd rather stare at this screen. Why?
1. I'm not much of a football person
2. This has turned out to be one boring match.
All our lives we work and then procrastinate and blame everyone other than ourselves for the absence of a vacation. And when you are on vacation, what do you complain about? Exactly. Nothing.
Maybe conspiracy theories are all wrong. Maybe there'e no peace on Earth merely because that's not possible. Why you ask. I, being the generous one, shall oblige and enlighten you. Its because when things are perfect, everything is short-lived. I understand that the logic takes a while to settle.
Picture this.
Your neighbourhood, your school, your friends, your life were all just perfect. It actually takes an effort to imagine this in the first place. Now, what next? How would you actually choreograph a life where everything is perfect?
Now you go back a paragraph and read again and agree that its not possible.
But like all problems in the world, a solution exists. And its not a complex equation or a long Bill or Capitalism. Its one word. A word that I associate with one great man. Einstein.
And the word : Relativity.
Perfection is not possible, but relative perfection, I believe, is very much attainable.
But where there is relativity, there is perspective. And where there is perspective, there is everything you and I love about humanity.
When Morgan Freeman explains the beauty of free will in Bruce Almighty its more than profound to say the least.
That whole movie is a symbolic reverse of yesterday's notions. That the white man is greater. Whoever decided to make a black man play the role of God, God bless him.
Even if you never realized the symbology, your sub conscience accepted it. And that is the beauty of it.
And by giving his powers to Bruce, he establishes equality among the races, and in his own way ending the debate once and for all.
Now you may agree, disagree or laugh at what I've written above. And its because you can and will. And thats why you are human.
And its learning to weave acceptance and tolerance in the wee gaps between prejudice and irrationality that perspective produces that helps each one of us become a better human.
Take any random person, and you will disagree on 99 things but agree on one.
And that Ladies and Gentlemen, is the Beauty of it.
Hoping Someone Scores Soon,
V
____________________________________________________
Now Reading : Not Much
Now Listening : Suno Aisha - Aisha
Revelations - Audioslave
Just Watched - Titanic
In another note, its about time Indian Music channels take a break from Reality TV and start playing some bloody music.
The FIFA World Cup Final is running in front of me but I'd rather stare at this screen. Why?
1. I'm not much of a football person
2. This has turned out to be one boring match.
All our lives we work and then procrastinate and blame everyone other than ourselves for the absence of a vacation. And when you are on vacation, what do you complain about? Exactly. Nothing.
Maybe conspiracy theories are all wrong. Maybe there'e no peace on Earth merely because that's not possible. Why you ask. I, being the generous one, shall oblige and enlighten you. Its because when things are perfect, everything is short-lived. I understand that the logic takes a while to settle.
Picture this.
Your neighbourhood, your school, your friends, your life were all just perfect. It actually takes an effort to imagine this in the first place. Now, what next? How would you actually choreograph a life where everything is perfect?
Now you go back a paragraph and read again and agree that its not possible.
But like all problems in the world, a solution exists. And its not a complex equation or a long Bill or Capitalism. Its one word. A word that I associate with one great man. Einstein.
And the word : Relativity.
Perfection is not possible, but relative perfection, I believe, is very much attainable.
But where there is relativity, there is perspective. And where there is perspective, there is everything you and I love about humanity.
When Morgan Freeman explains the beauty of free will in Bruce Almighty its more than profound to say the least.
That whole movie is a symbolic reverse of yesterday's notions. That the white man is greater. Whoever decided to make a black man play the role of God, God bless him.
Even if you never realized the symbology, your sub conscience accepted it. And that is the beauty of it.
And by giving his powers to Bruce, he establishes equality among the races, and in his own way ending the debate once and for all.
Now you may agree, disagree or laugh at what I've written above. And its because you can and will. And thats why you are human.
And its learning to weave acceptance and tolerance in the wee gaps between prejudice and irrationality that perspective produces that helps each one of us become a better human.
Take any random person, and you will disagree on 99 things but agree on one.
And that Ladies and Gentlemen, is the Beauty of it.
Hoping Someone Scores Soon,
V
____________________________________________________
Now Reading : Not Much
Now Listening : Suno Aisha - Aisha
Revelations - Audioslave
Just Watched - Titanic
In another note, its about time Indian Music channels take a break from Reality TV and start playing some bloody music.
Thursday, 24 June 2010
London,Thou Art Awesome
Its bin a hell of a time to sum up the rest of this post. Got back from London this morning and I'm really tired. Sleepy, hungry and tired. Hopefully will get some sleep. A long time back I used to wonder why I keep saying hopefully and not maybe or surely. Why not something more concrete than hope. I know why. For a while now. In the life that we live, filled with the avoidable yet inevitable complex emotions, something hanging loosely left for our own comprehension is so much better than the dead end that definition gives us.
Put it this way, even if I confirm something you're totally psyched for and are happy to no limits, what I've assured you is all that you will get. If I give you hope (which I will) then I leave you to comprehend the extent that the hope will reach and the possibility that things may not take place. And make you ready for it. In other words, when you anticipate and digest the worst, only then, can you truly, completely enjoy the best.
And that is the most thoughtful thing my mind has produced in a while. Which has been a stagnant place. Sleep, food, Tv, music , sleep is all I've done which left hardly any room for any thought. Vacations man, don't judge me.
But that was till London came along. Spur of the moment plan from Dad. And we were off.
I'm of two minds here. Whether I share the experiences of London or leave you with hope to comprehend to your own likes.
I'm gonna go with the second. If you know me and we meet and talk, I'll end up sharing things with you but here, its better off to leave you to imagine.
I did the same things, tourist attractions, blah blah blah.
What really made the trip awesome is a conversation for a time later than this. Hopefully.
But I'll tell you this. A part of me is still in London. Somewhere in the Tube Stations, or at Wimbledon, or at The Apple Store/Ferrari Store in Oxford Street or at the convenience store where I picked up my stuff.
And just like I said above, I hope I get to go to London again. And this hope shall help pass many a boring night to come.
But where London disappears, Stagnation reappears.
Hoping we do have that Conversation,
V
__________________________________________________
Now Reading : Top Gear Mag
Now Listening : Comfortably Numb - Pink Floyd
Cheers
Put it this way, even if I confirm something you're totally psyched for and are happy to no limits, what I've assured you is all that you will get. If I give you hope (which I will) then I leave you to comprehend the extent that the hope will reach and the possibility that things may not take place. And make you ready for it. In other words, when you anticipate and digest the worst, only then, can you truly, completely enjoy the best.
And that is the most thoughtful thing my mind has produced in a while. Which has been a stagnant place. Sleep, food, Tv, music , sleep is all I've done which left hardly any room for any thought. Vacations man, don't judge me.
But that was till London came along. Spur of the moment plan from Dad. And we were off.
I'm of two minds here. Whether I share the experiences of London or leave you with hope to comprehend to your own likes.
I'm gonna go with the second. If you know me and we meet and talk, I'll end up sharing things with you but here, its better off to leave you to imagine.
I did the same things, tourist attractions, blah blah blah.
What really made the trip awesome is a conversation for a time later than this. Hopefully.
But I'll tell you this. A part of me is still in London. Somewhere in the Tube Stations, or at Wimbledon, or at The Apple Store/Ferrari Store in Oxford Street or at the convenience store where I picked up my stuff.
And just like I said above, I hope I get to go to London again. And this hope shall help pass many a boring night to come.
But where London disappears, Stagnation reappears.
Hoping we do have that Conversation,
V
__________________________________________________
Now Reading : Top Gear Mag
Now Listening : Comfortably Numb - Pink Floyd
Cheers
Saturday, 5 June 2010
Part One Of Many
We're both first timers here. Myself, a virgin blogger and you, you're just a first time reader. So I doubt we can wave hands and hug and greet each other like we're good old chums.
Till we get another word for what I do, lets just call me a writer.I am a man of many words, fullstops, commas and recently semicolons thanks to C++. I started posting small pieces every month on facebook (which will be up shortly over here on archives) and due to peer pressure form all the great writings out there and from a few friends, here I am.
We're not really dating so I'll save you the introduction and everything other than my writing.
I just finished watching Wake Up Sid, and I have to say its a pretty good movie. But they ruined the ending.
Actually, most movies have messed up endings. The kind that make you feel somebody's tampered with the original essence of the movie.
Like here, Aisha and Sid say they love each other. Why?
Most times in life, the good guy doesn't win. The villain with more money and political influence eventually forces the good guy into submission. He doesn't win the glamorous chick and they sure as hell don't live happily ever after. Then why do all movies have a happy ending?
In Wake Up Sid, why do they turn a perfectly dysfunctional friendship into love?
What is love, really? Propoganda, movies and retards like Stephenie Meyer (I have not read the book nor seen the movie, mind you!) change the entire meaning of love. Its not an elevated friendship neither is it infatuationally boosted conversations. I don't know what love is myself but I'm sure its not any of the above.
This blog is not a late movie review service. Its me, in words.
If you like, follow. If you don't , there's a small 'X' on the top of the window to close it, do that. But if you're uncertain, hit F5, you never know, my next post may help you confirm.
Im not really known for first impressions or for making you want more form the beginning. So like all progressively good things in the world, give me some time and you'll realize I'm an acquired addiction.
Cheers,
V
_____________________________________________
Now Listening : Drive - Incubus
Now Reading : The Fountainhead - Ayn Rand
Now Feeling : Energized, thanks to Phet's contribution, the rain.
Till we get another word for what I do, lets just call me a writer.I am a man of many words, fullstops, commas and recently semicolons thanks to C++. I started posting small pieces every month on facebook (which will be up shortly over here on archives) and due to peer pressure form all the great writings out there and from a few friends, here I am.
We're not really dating so I'll save you the introduction and everything other than my writing.
I just finished watching Wake Up Sid, and I have to say its a pretty good movie. But they ruined the ending.
Actually, most movies have messed up endings. The kind that make you feel somebody's tampered with the original essence of the movie.
Like here, Aisha and Sid say they love each other. Why?
Most times in life, the good guy doesn't win. The villain with more money and political influence eventually forces the good guy into submission. He doesn't win the glamorous chick and they sure as hell don't live happily ever after. Then why do all movies have a happy ending?
In Wake Up Sid, why do they turn a perfectly dysfunctional friendship into love?
What is love, really? Propoganda, movies and retards like Stephenie Meyer (I have not read the book nor seen the movie, mind you!) change the entire meaning of love. Its not an elevated friendship neither is it infatuationally boosted conversations. I don't know what love is myself but I'm sure its not any of the above.
This blog is not a late movie review service. Its me, in words.
If you like, follow. If you don't , there's a small 'X' on the top of the window to close it, do that. But if you're uncertain, hit F5, you never know, my next post may help you confirm.
Im not really known for first impressions or for making you want more form the beginning. So like all progressively good things in the world, give me some time and you'll realize I'm an acquired addiction.
Cheers,
V
_____________________________________________
Now Listening : Drive - Incubus
Now Reading : The Fountainhead - Ayn Rand
Now Feeling : Energized, thanks to Phet's contribution, the rain.
Wednesday, 2 June 2010
To New Beginnings
I'm going to start off by saying that I really like the title I gave to this note and I hope you do too once you're done with this.
School ends tomorrow officially, but it ends today for me. I'm happy when things come to an end. happy or sad or even just a break. Its good to have some change, some variety and some more sleep. In case you haven't already figured out, I sleep a LOT .
To further explain the title, you need to watch Fight Club. In the scene where he threatens the dude outside a mall who wanted to be a vet. He takes his ID and promises to return it only when the dude makes an attempt towards becoming a vet. All this is done at gunpoint, btw. Tyler does all this. And his sidekick says all this was just a bit too far.
Then comes the best dialogue in the movie (after you are the all singing, all dancing crap of the world)
He tells him that when he wakes up the next day, he will look at life differently. The breakfast that he eats the next morning will taste better than any meal You or I have ever had.
I've seen this movie a lot of times but not recently, but this struck me only now. Things like this, I hope, are happening all over the world. But why must new beginnings, correction, effective new beginnings be only achieved by force? Why cant we change ourselves by ourselves? Why must someone else do the painful task of making us realize that we dont control shit of what happens in our lives?Why?
Truth be told, I dont know.
Do me a favour. If life has been monotonous for you, repetitive, uninteresting, boring or anything has been in the way you dont like it. Pick up your gun. Place it in your temple and let the one of your dreams, the one you want to be, take control. Let him/her talk to you and tell you how the life you deserve must be and how life you currently live is. Let the one who has taken backseat all this time, come alive and dictate the terms of the sorry excuse that you call a life. Listen like the listener you've never been and learn like the learner you've never been. The dreamer may be unrealistic but you have to agree, he/she has more patience than you do. That should suffice for credibility.
If you've not yet reached the part where your life has turned in the opposite direction of your dream (like me, a student) then see what you can learn from the dreamer for right now. When we begin newly, by ourselves, its a totally different thing. Tomorrow's breakfast will taste better.
This time, I'm not going to be the buzzkill by saying I listened to my dreamer, hope you do and abruptly sign off. Like I said, New Beginning, there will be changes.
These summer hols I'm going to put an effort (just an effort, mind you) into the subjects that I actually give a fuck about. I'm going to sleep only after I'm satisfied with what I did with the day, academic or non- academic related. I'm going to re- understand what it feels like to actually be on top of things and not be in a constant battle from below. I hope I can keep this spur-of-the-moment promise. Its bin a long time since I kept a promise to myself. So, a New Beginning to that as well!
I've always considered this line or related lines a cliche, but I guess its a true cliche.
Its not the end but the beginning.
In other issues, I want to start a blog. Peer pressure of all the writings out there. So watch out, my next post may just be from my blog.
If you've been a patient reader, hope you liked the title now.
If you did, raise your glass and make a toast To New Beginnings. Hopefully, there will be many more.
Hoping New Beginnings aren't forgotten as soon as they were conceptualized,
V
_______________________________________________
Now Playing : Somebody Told Me - The Killers
Now Feeling : Sleepy
Now Reading : The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
School ends tomorrow officially, but it ends today for me. I'm happy when things come to an end. happy or sad or even just a break. Its good to have some change, some variety and some more sleep. In case you haven't already figured out, I sleep a LOT .
To further explain the title, you need to watch Fight Club. In the scene where he threatens the dude outside a mall who wanted to be a vet. He takes his ID and promises to return it only when the dude makes an attempt towards becoming a vet. All this is done at gunpoint, btw. Tyler does all this. And his sidekick says all this was just a bit too far.
Then comes the best dialogue in the movie (after you are the all singing, all dancing crap of the world)
He tells him that when he wakes up the next day, he will look at life differently. The breakfast that he eats the next morning will taste better than any meal You or I have ever had.
I've seen this movie a lot of times but not recently, but this struck me only now. Things like this, I hope, are happening all over the world. But why must new beginnings, correction, effective new beginnings be only achieved by force? Why cant we change ourselves by ourselves? Why must someone else do the painful task of making us realize that we dont control shit of what happens in our lives?Why?
Truth be told, I dont know.
Do me a favour. If life has been monotonous for you, repetitive, uninteresting, boring or anything has been in the way you dont like it. Pick up your gun. Place it in your temple and let the one of your dreams, the one you want to be, take control. Let him/her talk to you and tell you how the life you deserve must be and how life you currently live is. Let the one who has taken backseat all this time, come alive and dictate the terms of the sorry excuse that you call a life. Listen like the listener you've never been and learn like the learner you've never been. The dreamer may be unrealistic but you have to agree, he/she has more patience than you do. That should suffice for credibility.
If you've not yet reached the part where your life has turned in the opposite direction of your dream (like me, a student) then see what you can learn from the dreamer for right now. When we begin newly, by ourselves, its a totally different thing. Tomorrow's breakfast will taste better.
This time, I'm not going to be the buzzkill by saying I listened to my dreamer, hope you do and abruptly sign off. Like I said, New Beginning, there will be changes.
These summer hols I'm going to put an effort (just an effort, mind you) into the subjects that I actually give a fuck about. I'm going to sleep only after I'm satisfied with what I did with the day, academic or non- academic related. I'm going to re- understand what it feels like to actually be on top of things and not be in a constant battle from below. I hope I can keep this spur-of-the-moment promise. Its bin a long time since I kept a promise to myself. So, a New Beginning to that as well!
I've always considered this line or related lines a cliche, but I guess its a true cliche.
Its not the end but the beginning.
In other issues, I want to start a blog. Peer pressure of all the writings out there. So watch out, my next post may just be from my blog.
If you've been a patient reader, hope you liked the title now.
If you did, raise your glass and make a toast To New Beginnings. Hopefully, there will be many more.
Hoping New Beginnings aren't forgotten as soon as they were conceptualized,
V
_______________________________________________
Now Playing : Somebody Told Me - The Killers
Now Feeling : Sleepy
Now Reading : The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
Friday, 14 May 2010
Silence
One more deviation from the commonplace. I usually like to title my notes with 2 or more words. Usually something vague and I hope, intriguing. This time however, its one word. A word that I like and dislike. A word that most of don't enjoy and some of us tuned to submit.
Silence
Its a weird thing. There are varieties of this silence. A bone chilling silence. A library's often-violated silence. An induced silence. An inspired silence. A forced silence. An awkward silence. (Trust me, I could write a book on awkward silences and my experiences with them) A solemn silence. A thought-filled silence. A mournful silence. A cut-the-crap-and-just-speak silence. An eerie silence. A romantic silence. A hungry silence. An eager silence. A silence that you feel before something wrong happens. A I-dont-belong-here silence. A pre-conversation silence. A stare-into-the-eyes silence.
All these silences, under the right circumstances can be forced/faked on someone. Which happens to all of us on an almost daily basis. But thats not my point.
My point is the kind of silence that you want to be a part of. It could be any one of the ones mentioned above, but what makes a difference ( a world of a difference at that) is the fact that you want to be silent. Out of respect. Out of love. A silence that you, not enjoy, but will not break unless necessary.
I spent this evening at Borders. With a Starbucks in my hand and a great book in the other. I was part of a silence that I truly wanted to be part of. A silent so calming and peaceful, you should have been there to understand how awesome it was. To say the least, I reconnected with my spiritual side. This will sound unbelievable and quite a bit stupid to most of you but with the right kind of silence and a great book, perspectives change. Lives change.
I never knew 4 hours would do so much for me.
By the way, the book was The Five People You Meet In Heaven by Mitch Albom. It took me half an hour to find the perfect book and this was indeed it. I haven't read such a simply written yet descriptively beautiful book in a long time.
As of now Life is good. Wanting to try Burger King. Studies Good. Music flowing in. Movies flowing in. HIMYM flowing in.
In other news, a Wise Man told me recently that I contradict myself a lot. Gotta work on that. Tired now. Off to Sleep. My Third Level, if I may say so.
Forever,
A Silent Reader,
V
_______________________________________
Now Listening : To the opposite of silence.
Now Feeling : Content
Good Night.
Silence
Its a weird thing. There are varieties of this silence. A bone chilling silence. A library's often-violated silence. An induced silence. An inspired silence. A forced silence. An awkward silence. (Trust me, I could write a book on awkward silences and my experiences with them) A solemn silence. A thought-filled silence. A mournful silence. A cut-the-crap-and-just-speak silence. An eerie silence. A romantic silence. A hungry silence. An eager silence. A silence that you feel before something wrong happens. A I-dont-belong-here silence. A pre-conversation silence. A stare-into-the-eyes silence.
All these silences, under the right circumstances can be forced/faked on someone. Which happens to all of us on an almost daily basis. But thats not my point.
My point is the kind of silence that you want to be a part of. It could be any one of the ones mentioned above, but what makes a difference ( a world of a difference at that) is the fact that you want to be silent. Out of respect. Out of love. A silence that you, not enjoy, but will not break unless necessary.
I spent this evening at Borders. With a Starbucks in my hand and a great book in the other. I was part of a silence that I truly wanted to be part of. A silent so calming and peaceful, you should have been there to understand how awesome it was. To say the least, I reconnected with my spiritual side. This will sound unbelievable and quite a bit stupid to most of you but with the right kind of silence and a great book, perspectives change. Lives change.
I never knew 4 hours would do so much for me.
By the way, the book was The Five People You Meet In Heaven by Mitch Albom. It took me half an hour to find the perfect book and this was indeed it. I haven't read such a simply written yet descriptively beautiful book in a long time.
As of now Life is good. Wanting to try Burger King. Studies Good. Music flowing in. Movies flowing in. HIMYM flowing in.
In other news, a Wise Man told me recently that I contradict myself a lot. Gotta work on that. Tired now. Off to Sleep. My Third Level, if I may say so.
Forever,
A Silent Reader,
V
_______________________________________
Now Listening : To the opposite of silence.
Now Feeling : Content
Good Night.
Sunday, 2 May 2010
Alive and Awake
Hullo,
This time I'm going to deviate from the commonplace and describe a few days and not an entire month.
This note is not about what I aspire this month to be and neither is it about the month ( or whatever portion of it ) that has transpired.
This note is about one (maybe two) relatively perfect days. My past months have either passed in indifference disguised as sleep or disappointment aggravated by exams. But the past two days I have woken up and NOT thought about the periods in which I can sleep in or what tuition lies ahead of me. These 2 days I actually have brushed with my mind and not let the toothbrush brush while my mind wanders off. And believe me, I enjoy it. The mundane things that I do every day with a million bloody things in my mind, these 2 days I did them like I was driving a car. Life...seemed simpler.
Which brings me to my theory that things are only as complicated as you think they are.
I can give you my word that I haven't slept in any period these days and I have taken down notes and understood. This, in all probability, a consequence of the excess sleep I've been getting. But there are 3 words that describe my mind and my life in general in these 2 days ;
Order of Disorder
An order has emerged these past two days out of nowhere merely because I was more awake than I was alive. More interested than I was incomplete.
All these days, I've been alive but occupied somewhere else, attentive but not at what lies in front of me but at what lies beyond me. I have been impervious to the perfect things happening in my life, from that exact arrangement of periods giving me time to complete everything and still go have that heavenly orange ice-cream. Or the fact that nearly everyday my school is lightened up by beautiful faces. Or even the lovely weather (in the eves, not the afternoons, definitely NOT them!)
But to spoil the rhythm that I ever so slowly captured, I hope disorder returns because life is far more fun then.
But I will tell you this,
The past two days have proven enough to put me into writing mode.
And now,
Off to Sleep, only to be Awake again,
V
__________________________________________
Now Listening : If I Were You - Hoobastank
Shine On - R.I.O
Now Reading : C++ : Function Overloading
Now Watching : A regular supply of movies and HIMYM episodes thanks to Big Man.
PS: I wrote this from my NEW laptop! ( Sorry, couldn't resist.)
This time I'm going to deviate from the commonplace and describe a few days and not an entire month.
This note is not about what I aspire this month to be and neither is it about the month ( or whatever portion of it ) that has transpired.
This note is about one (maybe two) relatively perfect days. My past months have either passed in indifference disguised as sleep or disappointment aggravated by exams. But the past two days I have woken up and NOT thought about the periods in which I can sleep in or what tuition lies ahead of me. These 2 days I actually have brushed with my mind and not let the toothbrush brush while my mind wanders off. And believe me, I enjoy it. The mundane things that I do every day with a million bloody things in my mind, these 2 days I did them like I was driving a car. Life...seemed simpler.
Which brings me to my theory that things are only as complicated as you think they are.
I can give you my word that I haven't slept in any period these days and I have taken down notes and understood. This, in all probability, a consequence of the excess sleep I've been getting. But there are 3 words that describe my mind and my life in general in these 2 days ;
Order of Disorder
An order has emerged these past two days out of nowhere merely because I was more awake than I was alive. More interested than I was incomplete.
All these days, I've been alive but occupied somewhere else, attentive but not at what lies in front of me but at what lies beyond me. I have been impervious to the perfect things happening in my life, from that exact arrangement of periods giving me time to complete everything and still go have that heavenly orange ice-cream. Or the fact that nearly everyday my school is lightened up by beautiful faces. Or even the lovely weather (in the eves, not the afternoons, definitely NOT them!)
But to spoil the rhythm that I ever so slowly captured, I hope disorder returns because life is far more fun then.
But I will tell you this,
The past two days have proven enough to put me into writing mode.
And now,
Off to Sleep, only to be Awake again,
V
__________________________________________
Now Listening : If I Were You - Hoobastank
Shine On - R.I.O
Now Reading : C++ : Function Overloading
Now Watching : A regular supply of movies and HIMYM episodes thanks to Big Man.
PS: I wrote this from my NEW laptop! ( Sorry, couldn't resist.)
Wednesday, 14 April 2010
The Long Walk
Greetings,
Below is a story.
A story of a guy with your name, your eyes, your smile, but a personality of his own.
For he is, after all my creation.
He starts a long walk on a road with no visible end. He walks, curious as ever down this road for all he can remember. On this walk, he sees most of the things that are now a part of our life. Prejudice, Irrationality, Racism, Politics, Capitalism, Religious Fanaticism, Kindness, Anger, Love, Adrenalin Rushes, Sexual Tensions...
Some excite him while others disgust him. Some he wish he had more of and some he wished never existed. But they were there, like the lizard in your room and the bugs in the air, they were there no matter how badly you wished they weren't.
He met a few people on this long walk. Some who stayed for so long but left him when he needed them the most and others who happened to be there exactly when he needed them, almost as if God picked them up and placed them right next to him. Some were with him because their roads led to the same point and nothing more.
This road bent and twisted at the most unexpected points and often had these long beautiful stretches. Oh those stretches. Long unwinding stretches of tarmac like blot on a clean white paper. A beautiful blot at that. The paper being the bloody brilliant scenery surrounding these roads. The stretches that made up for all the twists and turns. Gave you the false impression that road would always be smooth and straight and beautiful... But where's the fun in that?
Sometimes he wished he were faster down these roads and sometimes he wanted to go as slow as humanly possible. Sometimes he even wished this road didn't exist.Sometimes his legs hurted and he had to slow down or maybe something from the curves he's already maneuvered was pulling him back. but you can't walk the road you've already walked. So he just kept walking on.
Then there were the bumps.BUMPS
Funny word isn't it? Some of them were small while some of them were big. Some that had to be endured while others had shortcuts around 'em. Its amazing how something that can't talk to you can teach you so much more than someone that can understand and respond to you.
Soon he got better at walking on this road. So much better that he felt as if he were merely gliding over the road. And this is where the twists and bumps reappeared.
Some roads made him more visible while the others made the road forget him.
This road almost had a balance of its straights and curves, a balance that sadly most people didn't seem to notice. Result of which most people left the road on their own. Left and were never seen again. Never even remembered again, for some.
But everything that has a beginning has an end. Likewise, even the road came to an end. You'd know as it would be marked by a bench. The end of a long walk was an even longer rest. How fitting.
If you were lucky, which our guy was, you'd even get company at the bench. Who, you ask.
Why, the Architect of the road. The Architect was the last person you spoke to before you rested.
And so the Architect spoke to our guy. What exactly happened, will never be known for sure. But I could've sweared I heard our guy say:
* Silence. Heart pounding, sweat-generating silence. Even the birds fluttering nearby seemed to stand still in the air as our guy opened his mouth. It was like Eternity was the lock and our guy's vibrating Vocal Cords were the Key.*
This Road is a work of Art. It takes you to finish it to truly realize how bloody awesome it is. It takes a really long road for you to realize the value of something infinitely smaller. You need a similarity to truly understand a difference. You need noise to truly appreciate silence. You need bullshit to truly identify wisdom. You need the Devil to truly believe in God.
In fact, anything in the world can make a difference if you want it to. Anything at all.
And though I wish this road had more clarity, directions, help when required or signs to let you know what to expect, I wouldn't change it even if I had the power. And even if I had a choice to go back and choose another, I doubt I would. I have found what I have searched for all along this road. And I found it only when I stopped searching...
(Our guy was wise, wasn't he?)
And then he closed his eyes. And the Architect said these words that lit a smile on our guy's face. A smile that may disappear from his body, from the Architect's memory, from your memory, from my memory but it has already reached another place. Actually I doubt its a definite place. That smile is now everywhere. You just have to find it and display it.
He Said, "All is Well that ends well. Most people enjoy the road and then choose the wrong bench. You have struggles through the road and found the right bench. Your bench.
For the sake of all the good things in the world, Keep Smiling.
Still Walking,
V
_________________________________________________________________
If you still haven't understood what the Road was, you seriously have to read my earlier notes.
"Kill the Beast"
- Mr. Dominik
Now Listening : Memories - David Guetta ft. Kid CuDi
Hey, Soul Sister - Train
Now Feeling: Happy.
Now Going : To sleep
Below is a story.
A story of a guy with your name, your eyes, your smile, but a personality of his own.
For he is, after all my creation.
He starts a long walk on a road with no visible end. He walks, curious as ever down this road for all he can remember. On this walk, he sees most of the things that are now a part of our life. Prejudice, Irrationality, Racism, Politics, Capitalism, Religious Fanaticism, Kindness, Anger, Love, Adrenalin Rushes, Sexual Tensions...
Some excite him while others disgust him. Some he wish he had more of and some he wished never existed. But they were there, like the lizard in your room and the bugs in the air, they were there no matter how badly you wished they weren't.
He met a few people on this long walk. Some who stayed for so long but left him when he needed them the most and others who happened to be there exactly when he needed them, almost as if God picked them up and placed them right next to him. Some were with him because their roads led to the same point and nothing more.
This road bent and twisted at the most unexpected points and often had these long beautiful stretches. Oh those stretches. Long unwinding stretches of tarmac like blot on a clean white paper. A beautiful blot at that. The paper being the bloody brilliant scenery surrounding these roads. The stretches that made up for all the twists and turns. Gave you the false impression that road would always be smooth and straight and beautiful... But where's the fun in that?
Sometimes he wished he were faster down these roads and sometimes he wanted to go as slow as humanly possible. Sometimes he even wished this road didn't exist.Sometimes his legs hurted and he had to slow down or maybe something from the curves he's already maneuvered was pulling him back. but you can't walk the road you've already walked. So he just kept walking on.
Then there were the bumps.BUMPS
Funny word isn't it? Some of them were small while some of them were big. Some that had to be endured while others had shortcuts around 'em. Its amazing how something that can't talk to you can teach you so much more than someone that can understand and respond to you.
Soon he got better at walking on this road. So much better that he felt as if he were merely gliding over the road. And this is where the twists and bumps reappeared.
Some roads made him more visible while the others made the road forget him.
This road almost had a balance of its straights and curves, a balance that sadly most people didn't seem to notice. Result of which most people left the road on their own. Left and were never seen again. Never even remembered again, for some.
But everything that has a beginning has an end. Likewise, even the road came to an end. You'd know as it would be marked by a bench. The end of a long walk was an even longer rest. How fitting.
If you were lucky, which our guy was, you'd even get company at the bench. Who, you ask.
Why, the Architect of the road. The Architect was the last person you spoke to before you rested.
And so the Architect spoke to our guy. What exactly happened, will never be known for sure. But I could've sweared I heard our guy say:
* Silence. Heart pounding, sweat-generating silence. Even the birds fluttering nearby seemed to stand still in the air as our guy opened his mouth. It was like Eternity was the lock and our guy's vibrating Vocal Cords were the Key.*
This Road is a work of Art. It takes you to finish it to truly realize how bloody awesome it is. It takes a really long road for you to realize the value of something infinitely smaller. You need a similarity to truly understand a difference. You need noise to truly appreciate silence. You need bullshit to truly identify wisdom. You need the Devil to truly believe in God.
In fact, anything in the world can make a difference if you want it to. Anything at all.
And though I wish this road had more clarity, directions, help when required or signs to let you know what to expect, I wouldn't change it even if I had the power. And even if I had a choice to go back and choose another, I doubt I would. I have found what I have searched for all along this road. And I found it only when I stopped searching...
(Our guy was wise, wasn't he?)
And then he closed his eyes. And the Architect said these words that lit a smile on our guy's face. A smile that may disappear from his body, from the Architect's memory, from your memory, from my memory but it has already reached another place. Actually I doubt its a definite place. That smile is now everywhere. You just have to find it and display it.
He Said, "All is Well that ends well. Most people enjoy the road and then choose the wrong bench. You have struggles through the road and found the right bench. Your bench.
For the sake of all the good things in the world, Keep Smiling.
Still Walking,
V
_________________________________________________________________
If you still haven't understood what the Road was, you seriously have to read my earlier notes.
"Kill the Beast"
- Mr. Dominik
Now Listening : Memories - David Guetta ft. Kid CuDi
Hey, Soul Sister - Train
Now Feeling: Happy.
Now Going : To sleep
Monday, 29 March 2010
Lost But Never Found
Hey,
A month it has been since we last...read/wrote? Let me begin by thanking you. The very fact that your eyes are moving over the very words that my fingers have typed makes me smile. You may not relate to them, may not appreciate them, may not even pay attention to them but you are an audience. And you are what every writer wants. Maybe its too much to call myself a writer but till we get another term, I'm gonna stick with that.
This month can be summed in pretty much one word: SLEEP.
For all you haters who say you've done more epic things than this, I really don't care. There's nothing more comforting than a pillow, a nice blanket, no worries of a school, the two digits it brands upon you and sure as hell no timings to stick to. I find it the most awesome thing since I've hardly been able to do it in the recent past.
My mind has almost been a stagnant blackhole this month. Not much to think about when you're mind's taking rest all the time. Got a lot of lost music this month. Not too many movies. Quite a bit of Madina. Not too much of Shatti. Money crunches galore.
Browsed a lot of MMT's. Real touching shit man. Makes you appreciate your life so much more and helps you understand that even small actions can put a smile on someone else's life and rest apart, thats what life's most about, smiling.
Maybe its all the sleep but I cant write much this time. Almost forced myself to do this.
As for the title, its something that all the Texts From Last Nights & Makes Me Thinks that I formulated;
There's a quality that each and every one of possesses, not necessarily the same quality. A quality that is either inculcated or brought into you by whatever source. Its not the quality that others define you by. Its the quality that you define yourself by. A quality that not everyone has to know but you must. A quality that may be diffilcult to obtain but bloody easy to lose. All this third person description might have made you feel that I'm going to tell you the quality. Read again. Its not a quality that everyone shares.
If, however you lose this quality, you lose yourself. And once its lost, it can never be found. Sure, you can adopt another quality, but you're never the same. You can change the definition of anything but it will never be the same. Hope you get what I'm trying to say.
From TFLN I've read about people doing some VERY embarrassing stuff and then texting about it. I mean who the hell does some very screwed up shit and then texts someone about it??
Makes Me Think is a site that every bloody one of you should visit once in a while. Nothing will make you reconfirm that there are good people still on Earth than that site. Brilliant, to say the least.
This month has revolved around these two sites, Madina and Sherlock Holmes. Normal. If I may say so.
I found my quality during this month. And I'm bloody proud of it.
Hoping you find yours,
V
_________________________________________________________________________
(312): I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
(407): I went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Today, I am bound to a hospital bed, slowly losing my battle with cancer. About an hour ago, I told my wife that she must live her life to the fullest and accomplish great things after I'm gone. She kissed me on the forehead as she comforted our baby boy and said, "I already have." MMT
Today, I sat in class with my head down for most of the period. My teacher asked me to stay behind. I thought I was in trouble for not paying attention. Instead he said, “If you ever need someone to talk to, you know where to find me.” I intend to take him up on his offer tomorrow. MMT
Now Listening: Invisible - Will.I.Am
Now Eating: Pizza after a LONG time
Now Reading: The White Tiger- Aravind Adiga
Now Feeling: Relieved since I finally know when school reopens.
A month it has been since we last...read/wrote? Let me begin by thanking you. The very fact that your eyes are moving over the very words that my fingers have typed makes me smile. You may not relate to them, may not appreciate them, may not even pay attention to them but you are an audience. And you are what every writer wants. Maybe its too much to call myself a writer but till we get another term, I'm gonna stick with that.
This month can be summed in pretty much one word: SLEEP.
For all you haters who say you've done more epic things than this, I really don't care. There's nothing more comforting than a pillow, a nice blanket, no worries of a school, the two digits it brands upon you and sure as hell no timings to stick to. I find it the most awesome thing since I've hardly been able to do it in the recent past.
My mind has almost been a stagnant blackhole this month. Not much to think about when you're mind's taking rest all the time. Got a lot of lost music this month. Not too many movies. Quite a bit of Madina. Not too much of Shatti. Money crunches galore.
Browsed a lot of MMT's. Real touching shit man. Makes you appreciate your life so much more and helps you understand that even small actions can put a smile on someone else's life and rest apart, thats what life's most about, smiling.
Maybe its all the sleep but I cant write much this time. Almost forced myself to do this.
As for the title, its something that all the Texts From Last Nights & Makes Me Thinks that I formulated;
There's a quality that each and every one of possesses, not necessarily the same quality. A quality that is either inculcated or brought into you by whatever source. Its not the quality that others define you by. Its the quality that you define yourself by. A quality that not everyone has to know but you must. A quality that may be diffilcult to obtain but bloody easy to lose. All this third person description might have made you feel that I'm going to tell you the quality. Read again. Its not a quality that everyone shares.
If, however you lose this quality, you lose yourself. And once its lost, it can never be found. Sure, you can adopt another quality, but you're never the same. You can change the definition of anything but it will never be the same. Hope you get what I'm trying to say.
From TFLN I've read about people doing some VERY embarrassing stuff and then texting about it. I mean who the hell does some very screwed up shit and then texts someone about it??
Makes Me Think is a site that every bloody one of you should visit once in a while. Nothing will make you reconfirm that there are good people still on Earth than that site. Brilliant, to say the least.
This month has revolved around these two sites, Madina and Sherlock Holmes. Normal. If I may say so.
I found my quality during this month. And I'm bloody proud of it.
Hoping you find yours,
V
_________________________________________________________________________
(312): I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
(407): I went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Today, I am bound to a hospital bed, slowly losing my battle with cancer. About an hour ago, I told my wife that she must live her life to the fullest and accomplish great things after I'm gone. She kissed me on the forehead as she comforted our baby boy and said, "I already have." MMT
Today, I sat in class with my head down for most of the period. My teacher asked me to stay behind. I thought I was in trouble for not paying attention. Instead he said, “If you ever need someone to talk to, you know where to find me.” I intend to take him up on his offer tomorrow. MMT
Now Listening: Invisible - Will.I.Am
Now Eating: Pizza after a LONG time
Now Reading: The White Tiger- Aravind Adiga
Now Feeling: Relieved since I finally know when school reopens.
Saturday, 27 February 2010
A Cruel Mistress
I have an exam in less than 10 hours. And yet here I am writing my mind out because its bin a month. I write a piece every month or atleast I try to.
February has never been a month I enjoy and this one's been no different. Life, as ever, has had its ups and downs, but an enjoyable ride to my optimistic side. For example, this month's mid- day is the world's BIGGEST cliche. And no matter how much you deny it the truth will hit you that the day is after all a cliche. Irrelevant in my life, but cliches are hard to not notice.
I wish my life had more visibility, more reason, more vindication. But Life is never a dream. While I type away vaguely, theres a plan plotting in the Master's head. Some call it Fate.
My wishes may or may not come true, but that won't stop me from wishing. Nothing ever will.
School is boring me. There is nothing I will be thankful for learning in school except maybe a few rudrimentary aspects. I apologise for the lack of gratitude I hold to my education system but it is personal opinion. Who gives a shit?
Look around, beyond the whims of a teenage boy, behind the cries of a homophobic person who lives in denial of many things, there is someone with a lot of reason in judgement in the person whose typing this. An aspect that I hope someday someone will realize. But I can tell you for sure , my education system is not going to help in that..
Maybe this is an emotional outburst froma person who despises exams or maybe its a cry for recognition from a young adult. That is for you to decide.
This month has made me a bit sober. I'm not the person who will admit he's sorrow but Times change. Life is a cruel mistress who forces you to reconsider your every value, your morals, you yourself!
This note may not , actually, sure as hell will not make sense to many of you but I hope that when that day comes when you do, I know of it. And I thank you in advance for that.
Maybe this note has been an expression of my soberness with a mixture of my hatred of exams.
If this note made you sober too, then does that mean something?
I wouldn't know, you should.
Trying to tame the Cruel Mistress we call Life,forever,
V
______________________________________________________
Now reading: Chemistry notes
Now listening: Uff Teri Ada - Karthik calling Karthik
Now Off The Phone: with Ryan, trying to teach balancing a reaction in acidic and basic mediums. Hope I wasnt too confusing man.
Now Feeling: Come on, didn't you read the note at all? Well I'm feeling sober. And I have a headache.
February has never been a month I enjoy and this one's been no different. Life, as ever, has had its ups and downs, but an enjoyable ride to my optimistic side. For example, this month's mid- day is the world's BIGGEST cliche. And no matter how much you deny it the truth will hit you that the day is after all a cliche. Irrelevant in my life, but cliches are hard to not notice.
I wish my life had more visibility, more reason, more vindication. But Life is never a dream. While I type away vaguely, theres a plan plotting in the Master's head. Some call it Fate.
My wishes may or may not come true, but that won't stop me from wishing. Nothing ever will.
School is boring me. There is nothing I will be thankful for learning in school except maybe a few rudrimentary aspects. I apologise for the lack of gratitude I hold to my education system but it is personal opinion. Who gives a shit?
Look around, beyond the whims of a teenage boy, behind the cries of a homophobic person who lives in denial of many things, there is someone with a lot of reason in judgement in the person whose typing this. An aspect that I hope someday someone will realize. But I can tell you for sure , my education system is not going to help in that..
Maybe this is an emotional outburst froma person who despises exams or maybe its a cry for recognition from a young adult. That is for you to decide.
This month has made me a bit sober. I'm not the person who will admit he's sorrow but Times change. Life is a cruel mistress who forces you to reconsider your every value, your morals, you yourself!
This note may not , actually, sure as hell will not make sense to many of you but I hope that when that day comes when you do, I know of it. And I thank you in advance for that.
Maybe this note has been an expression of my soberness with a mixture of my hatred of exams.
If this note made you sober too, then does that mean something?
I wouldn't know, you should.
Trying to tame the Cruel Mistress we call Life,forever,
V
______________________________________________________
Now reading: Chemistry notes
Now listening: Uff Teri Ada - Karthik calling Karthik
Now Off The Phone: with Ryan, trying to teach balancing a reaction in acidic and basic mediums. Hope I wasnt too confusing man.
Now Feeling: Come on, didn't you read the note at all? Well I'm feeling sober. And I have a headache.
Friday, 15 January 2010
The Window That Woke Me Up
Let me begin by wishing anyone reading this a Happy New Year. Its young, new so go own. And if you don't then chill.. Cuz there's one more coming up. (Some optimistic bullshit I got in a text.)
I'm writing this in Comp period and Venky is like..two desks away from me, sleeping (who could have guessed that?)
Speaking of sleeping, I woke up a few nights back, early-morning or late-night, I don't remember and I saw this light shining outside my window. A light that looked almost Heavenly
You must understand that I was insanely sleepy and there's a big chance all this was a dream.
But I was up and decided not to go back to bes anytime soon. So I pressed play to my favourite song and I drew the curtain to see what Heaven looked like..
Obviously enough, the neighbour's backyard lights were on. "Go back to sleep", I said to myself. But I didn't. I stopped the song and stared out of the window and into the black sky illuminated by the Moon for the longest time I have stared at the skies. Got me thinking.
16 years on, will I still look out of the window with the same thoughts running through my mind and with the same mentality?
Will I be alive then, for starters?
Will my house be better than whatever lay outside?
Will there be friends visible through that window?
Will there be someone puling me back to bed and ask me to stare at her instead of outside?
Will I have regrets then?
Will I have something to look forward to out of the window?
Thats a Lot of questions for someone that sleepy you might say. But my brain was in Drive gear and it gave me a hell lot more questions than the ones I've posted here.
Life is bloody uncertain and I'm not sure if I like it that way..
For all I know an uncertain life may be the most rewarding, most exciting or maybe even the most boring. And I also don't know if this incident is just some Emotional Attyachar caused by my marks or its something way deeper.
But I know this for sure.
I will never look out of any Window the same way.
Or Will I?
Till the next bump on the road,
V
____________________________
Now Listening : To Anuradha speak of binary, octal and hexadecimal.
Now Reading: Between the lines.
Now Drooling Over: The Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG and the Harley-Davidson Nightrod Special.
I'm writing this in Comp period and Venky is like..two desks away from me, sleeping (who could have guessed that?)
Speaking of sleeping, I woke up a few nights back, early-morning or late-night, I don't remember and I saw this light shining outside my window. A light that looked almost Heavenly
You must understand that I was insanely sleepy and there's a big chance all this was a dream.
But I was up and decided not to go back to bes anytime soon. So I pressed play to my favourite song and I drew the curtain to see what Heaven looked like..
Obviously enough, the neighbour's backyard lights were on. "Go back to sleep", I said to myself. But I didn't. I stopped the song and stared out of the window and into the black sky illuminated by the Moon for the longest time I have stared at the skies. Got me thinking.
16 years on, will I still look out of the window with the same thoughts running through my mind and with the same mentality?
Will I be alive then, for starters?
Will my house be better than whatever lay outside?
Will there be friends visible through that window?
Will there be someone puling me back to bed and ask me to stare at her instead of outside?
Will I have regrets then?
Will I have something to look forward to out of the window?
Thats a Lot of questions for someone that sleepy you might say. But my brain was in Drive gear and it gave me a hell lot more questions than the ones I've posted here.
Life is bloody uncertain and I'm not sure if I like it that way..
For all I know an uncertain life may be the most rewarding, most exciting or maybe even the most boring. And I also don't know if this incident is just some Emotional Attyachar caused by my marks or its something way deeper.
But I know this for sure.
I will never look out of any Window the same way.
Or Will I?
Till the next bump on the road,
V
____________________________
Now Listening : To Anuradha speak of binary, octal and hexadecimal.
Now Reading: Between the lines.
Now Drooling Over: The Mercedes-Benz SLS AMG and the Harley-Davidson Nightrod Special.
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